Sunday, August 1, 2010

Mullet Over

For anyone reading this who has not heard, Target and Best Buy have used their newly found right to political speech in the form of campaign contributions to a homophobic gubernatorial candidate in their home state of Minnesota. This does not sit well with me for numerous reasons, but the one that has me boycotting both stores is the hating on gay people. Ick.

Both corporations claim that by supporting Re. Tom Emmer, they are supporting the pro-business part of his platform. Apparently, after the election Emmer will be split into pieces and only the corporate sponsored bits will get to play governor. All joking aside, the wanton disavowal of social responsibility that is inherent in such a statement really rankles. Why is that? And then it hit me:

It is a mullet.

Target and Best Buy are all about their business up front, but they don't see any reason to give up the gay-bashing party in the back. They can tuck the ponytail into their collars for press conferences, but they aren't fooling anyone. If they say, "It's not really a ~real~ mullet," then we take a look at the company they keep.

And this Emmer guy, he is all about the mullet. Respectable talk about tradition and love of family in the front with a big (and I suspect permed) fear/hatred of gay people in the back. Given that this guy's "Social Values" statement on his website deals entirely with other people's bedrooms and weddings, he's not even trying to fool anybody. Target and Best Buy are either slicked back party dudes or they are terminally stupid. I suspect it's some of both.

It was big news when Iran banned mullets. (Really?! Whatever.) Red-blooded Americans everywhere are welcome to wear mullets with pride. Enjoy those mullets! Defend them! But remember, Target and Best Buy, as much as you love that mullet, and as cool as it seems to you, a whole lot of the rest of the world thinks it's tacky. Really tacky.

I'm steering clear of that mess. Because, when it comes right down to it, I choose to party with a classier crowd.